Oh fall break--
what happiness you make!
I love to sleep, vacation, and rest.
The timing in October happens just when it's best.
This FB, I went to Disney,
massage, the rides, Grand Floridian, incurred my family's envy.
Now, I'm back and it's Tuesday night.
Thinking about Sunday gives me a fright!
My main concern--oh, what will I do?
When I head back on Monday with the middle school crew...
Hope you are finding some time to rest this October. Fall is my favorite season, and I'm sitting up late watching episodes of House that I've missed and thinking how the rest of this week needs to continue to be refreshing body, mind, and soul.
October is widely held to be the most stressful/discouraging/ready to quit time for a teacher, so I'm hoping that with Fall Break's help, I can make it through. Lots of love!
Tuesday, October 19, 2010
Friday, September 24, 2010
Ultimate Fail
So it's been over 1 month since I have written on this blog. It's really sad. This past month has been the hardest of my 23 years. Maybe that's a testament as to how relatively easy my life has been so far, but I have worked my tail off.
I have had days that were so horrible (a fight I couldn't break up that left me so shaken I closed/locked my door and sobbed) mixed in with days that went miraculously well. I have been bullied by parents, given countless hugs, and today one of my precious bees slung his arm around me and said "This is my teacher y'all." I have literally had to pray to get out of the car in the school parking lot several days because I just didn't want to go in. I have one class that even today completely walked all over me. I got a card from my 4th grade teacher that still makes me tune up to cry just writing about it. I have been so loved by friends and family, as for the first time in my life, I have struggled. There are teachers in my building who are so much better than me, and it's hard to watch them be more successful and feel like I am working harder. There are teachers in my building that the kids absolutely love. It is hard having some kids really not like me.
I mean, really not like. One of our vocab words this past week was loathe--to feel intense hate for... One of my bees used this sample sentence: I loathe Ms. Parsley. Nice. This little bee immediately told me they were just kidding. Hmm... Really made my day.
I have been pushing through and now have a weekend without a wedding or Saturday school. (AP's and CM's wedding were two high points during the month that helped keep me going!!!) I thought I should share.
Things are better (yesterday was awesome, today so-so), but thanks to all of you who texted, hugged, or loved on me during this month. I am so thankful to have so many blessings in my life. I will keep you posted. 14 days till fall break.
Lots of love, xoxo
I have had days that were so horrible (a fight I couldn't break up that left me so shaken I closed/locked my door and sobbed) mixed in with days that went miraculously well. I have been bullied by parents, given countless hugs, and today one of my precious bees slung his arm around me and said "This is my teacher y'all." I have literally had to pray to get out of the car in the school parking lot several days because I just didn't want to go in. I have one class that even today completely walked all over me. I got a card from my 4th grade teacher that still makes me tune up to cry just writing about it. I have been so loved by friends and family, as for the first time in my life, I have struggled. There are teachers in my building who are so much better than me, and it's hard to watch them be more successful and feel like I am working harder. There are teachers in my building that the kids absolutely love. It is hard having some kids really not like me.
I mean, really not like. One of our vocab words this past week was loathe--to feel intense hate for... One of my bees used this sample sentence: I loathe Ms. Parsley. Nice. This little bee immediately told me they were just kidding. Hmm... Really made my day.
I have been pushing through and now have a weekend without a wedding or Saturday school. (AP's and CM's wedding were two high points during the month that helped keep me going!!!) I thought I should share.
Things are better (yesterday was awesome, today so-so), but thanks to all of you who texted, hugged, or loved on me during this month. I am so thankful to have so many blessings in my life. I will keep you posted. 14 days till fall break.
Lots of love, xoxo
Saturday, August 14, 2010
First day down!
We started school this past week, and it went pretty well. I mean, we only had students on Thursday and had professional development the other days. My little bees are still definitely pushing the limits, and there are times when I get super stressed. For instance, on Thursday, our classes were 70 minutes. During summer school, they were 50 minutes. In two of my classes, I completely ran out of things to do. I read aloud from Oh, The Places You'll Go and ad libbed about procedures. TERRIFYING to be a new teacher and not have an activity. 24 sets of eyes looking at you to tell them what to do next. Plus, with some of my classes that struggle behaviorally, I feel like I have to keep moving at a pretty fast pace, or I may have some kids acting out. However, the biggest issue I am having is finding the time to plan. I mean, planning is taking FOREVER. By the time I make classwork and homework and find reading passages, it has been 3 hours! And, I need a new plan for each day. This definitely is not sustainable, and I have to get better.
That is why I am trying to do better and plan right now. Ideally, I would like to get my whole week planned out on Sunday and then slightly modify the lessons as needed. It sounds so simple, but I am struggling. There are so many other things to do. I mean, I need to buy a copy of the Red Pyramid, put my summer school data into a tracker, fix a seating chart, and re-arrange my room to provide reading space. And this needs to happen by Monday. Plus, I mean I have church, family coming to visit, etc.
I am a little overwhelmed. Check that, I am a lot OVERWHELMED. At this point last year, I was depressed because I didn't have my own classroom and I was bored. I craved the stress and litte things that went with having your own classroom. I am trying to remember that as I swim through what seems like a never-ending to-do list. School is happy, but harder than last year. I am going to try to keep my head above water for the next couple of weeks until I get into a routine. Say a prayer!
That is why I am trying to do better and plan right now. Ideally, I would like to get my whole week planned out on Sunday and then slightly modify the lessons as needed. It sounds so simple, but I am struggling. There are so many other things to do. I mean, I need to buy a copy of the Red Pyramid, put my summer school data into a tracker, fix a seating chart, and re-arrange my room to provide reading space. And this needs to happen by Monday. Plus, I mean I have church, family coming to visit, etc.
I am a little overwhelmed. Check that, I am a lot OVERWHELMED. At this point last year, I was depressed because I didn't have my own classroom and I was bored. I craved the stress and litte things that went with having your own classroom. I am trying to remember that as I swim through what seems like a never-ending to-do list. School is happy, but harder than last year. I am going to try to keep my head above water for the next couple of weeks until I get into a routine. Say a prayer!
Saturday, July 24, 2010
SHAMEfully neglected!
How can it possibly be 19 days since my last post? Ridiculous. I think it's a testament to how crazy my life has been. I know everyone has their own brand of crazy, but July has been even wilder than wedding season in full swing. Jeez la peez.
Anywho I have officially completed my first week as a real, grown-up teacher. My students seem to be doing okay, and I am making it. Definitely no miracle prodigy teacher, but I think I am getting better. My little bees didn't heckle me out of the room in tears, which I was a little afraid of. There are still lots of things I need to work on (pencil sharpener--why didn't someone tell me what a huge deal that was?!?!), including the fact I have a couple of bees who will just jump up in the middle of my lesson and start dancing. However, overall, I am feeling positive. That sentiment is after 7 days of instruction. Let me just say that no one can understand the EXTREME nervousness the night before and the morning of your first day of teaching. I was nearly irrational and shaking I was so nervous. I am not a crier, but I almost broke down the night before I was so freaked out. I was trying to pray through it, and I know God was watching out for me. But I was a nervous wreck...
Today, I finished up taking my Praxis tests (5th and final, as long as I passed!) and finished up my 6th certification/masters class. (4 classes to go!) Earlier this week, I submitted my portfolio to apply for certification. These were all huge projects that were really weighing on me. Whoosh. Now, SJ is married. M is about to be back from her summer job in Louisville, and LL is getting pumped up for WKU and rush. I have 5 more days of summer school! Woohoo!! Then, I get until August 7th off! The fam may even be planning a spontaneous vacay. I am suuuper pumped.
I am really enjoying this weekend. Today, I saw Despicable Me (in 3d), which was AWESOME and ate at Carraba's for the first time. This past week, I have been in survival mode. Up at 4:50 am, to school by 6 and home around 7pm. I am also getting to know (and love) two new roommates, so we have had some rommate time. With all that, plus the jazz i listed in the paragraph above, I have not had time to turn around, much less water my geraniums. Today, I finally caught up with EF and LW. Now, I need to send some RSVPs and mail some bills. Unfortunately, it's 11:30 pm, and I just got brownies out of the oven and am falling asleep. Woot woot for paryting on Saturday night!!
Sleep well!
Anywho I have officially completed my first week as a real, grown-up teacher. My students seem to be doing okay, and I am making it. Definitely no miracle prodigy teacher, but I think I am getting better. My little bees didn't heckle me out of the room in tears, which I was a little afraid of. There are still lots of things I need to work on (pencil sharpener--why didn't someone tell me what a huge deal that was?!?!), including the fact I have a couple of bees who will just jump up in the middle of my lesson and start dancing. However, overall, I am feeling positive. That sentiment is after 7 days of instruction. Let me just say that no one can understand the EXTREME nervousness the night before and the morning of your first day of teaching. I was nearly irrational and shaking I was so nervous. I am not a crier, but I almost broke down the night before I was so freaked out. I was trying to pray through it, and I know God was watching out for me. But I was a nervous wreck...
Today, I finished up taking my Praxis tests (5th and final, as long as I passed!) and finished up my 6th certification/masters class. (4 classes to go!) Earlier this week, I submitted my portfolio to apply for certification. These were all huge projects that were really weighing on me. Whoosh. Now, SJ is married. M is about to be back from her summer job in Louisville, and LL is getting pumped up for WKU and rush. I have 5 more days of summer school! Woohoo!! Then, I get until August 7th off! The fam may even be planning a spontaneous vacay. I am suuuper pumped.
I am really enjoying this weekend. Today, I saw Despicable Me (in 3d), which was AWESOME and ate at Carraba's for the first time. This past week, I have been in survival mode. Up at 4:50 am, to school by 6 and home around 7pm. I am also getting to know (and love) two new roommates, so we have had some rommate time. With all that, plus the jazz i listed in the paragraph above, I have not had time to turn around, much less water my geraniums. Today, I finally caught up with EF and LW. Now, I need to send some RSVPs and mail some bills. Unfortunately, it's 11:30 pm, and I just got brownies out of the oven and am falling asleep. Woot woot for paryting on Saturday night!!
Sleep well!
Monday, July 5, 2010
Back to School, back to school!!
Yep, that's right. My school goes back July 1st. This has all ready been a crazy start, as I had to lead a professional development on school culture this past Thursday. Suuuuper stressful--my school's whole leadership team was there. I did okay--maybe a little too silly and definitely too fast. On Friday, we had professional development all day, then I was home in the BG all weekend. Our counselor strong-armed the principal into giving us today (Monday, 7/5) off. It has been fabu. I came back to Nash around noon and have been cleaning and doing odd jobs since then.
I also (FINALLY!) returned some emails that I've been meaning to send. I am mega-pumped that some good friends are going to visit in the next couple of weeks (EF, BC, and hopefully KB!)and trying to focus on that and the reason I'm teaching to stay positive. I mean, I'm not down, but I'm definitely a little bummed. Most of my other teacher friends are looking forward to another whole month of poolside relaxation and I am back to school. I mean, it's nice to get back into routine, but getting up and teaching in July is kind of an adjustment.
Our kids come July 12th, so we have 4 more days this week of just faculty and staff PD. This is nice since it gives me a chance to get my classroom ready and whipped into shape before I get my new little bees. I am excited but nervous about my first days legit teaching a whole class. Plus, our summer school schedule is pretty scary with only a 25 minute lunch break from 8-2pm. It's going to fly by.
On a different note, I am very excited to welcome 2 new roommates to my little Nashville abode. O and L moved on to greener pastures (and I miss them!), and L and T moved in! They seem awesome so far, and we are settling in together. It's interesting to see how 2 new people change up a house. Since the 4th and final roommate just moved in today, I will have to keep you posted on what things change.
In other news, LL got a job at a salon in BG which is verra verra exciting. It's a little out of her comfort zone, but I think it's good for her. EF is coming back to the US for awhile. So, July is shaping up to be a pretty awesome month even if I am working 8-5 the whole time. Maybe I'll burn a CD with "9-5" on it. I do love me some Dolly.
Happy Independence Day lovelies!
I also (FINALLY!) returned some emails that I've been meaning to send. I am mega-pumped that some good friends are going to visit in the next couple of weeks (EF, BC, and hopefully KB!)and trying to focus on that and the reason I'm teaching to stay positive. I mean, I'm not down, but I'm definitely a little bummed. Most of my other teacher friends are looking forward to another whole month of poolside relaxation and I am back to school. I mean, it's nice to get back into routine, but getting up and teaching in July is kind of an adjustment.
Our kids come July 12th, so we have 4 more days this week of just faculty and staff PD. This is nice since it gives me a chance to get my classroom ready and whipped into shape before I get my new little bees. I am excited but nervous about my first days legit teaching a whole class. Plus, our summer school schedule is pretty scary with only a 25 minute lunch break from 8-2pm. It's going to fly by.
On a different note, I am very excited to welcome 2 new roommates to my little Nashville abode. O and L moved on to greener pastures (and I miss them!), and L and T moved in! They seem awesome so far, and we are settling in together. It's interesting to see how 2 new people change up a house. Since the 4th and final roommate just moved in today, I will have to keep you posted on what things change.
In other news, LL got a job at a salon in BG which is verra verra exciting. It's a little out of her comfort zone, but I think it's good for her. EF is coming back to the US for awhile. So, July is shaping up to be a pretty awesome month even if I am working 8-5 the whole time. Maybe I'll burn a CD with "9-5" on it. I do love me some Dolly.
Happy Independence Day lovelies!
Monday, June 21, 2010
Home alone...
Why do I hate being home alone? Why do I get scared? It makes me sad that I can't even have faith in my own home. I mean, "He's got the whole world in His hands..." and I'm worried about myself. It's like I hear noises and start freaking myself out.
For example:
Oh, that delivery man was definitely a killer. He'll be back tonight.
Or, craigslist killer. I did give my address to the girl who never came or called.
Shaz. A serial killer (like Silence of Lambs) is going to come and get me...
I mean, the list goes on and on and gets more and more irrational. It is a running joke that I'm paranoid, and I know to some degree, God made me creative and able to see small details. However, I know that worry does not do any good.
As I'm home tonight (by myself), I think about some other things going on in my life. I think about being around some very sick people recently. I mean, very. These people are able to have faith and not be scared. Yet I am scared in my own home. What will I do when life really storms on me?
About six months ago, as I was talking about what I would do if a person held a gun on me, one of the people in the group (who had recently been mugged at gun point) asked me what I was so afraid of. It made me think. What am I so afraid of? Loss of control? Death? Losing someone I love? I mean, these are sad thoughts for bedtime, but it helps me to put everything in perspective. I need to be able to have peace in the good times (like right now) and the bad.
God, help me remember that you are always watching. No matter how much I allow myself to get freaked out, you are there. Everything is according to your plan.
Sleep tight bloggy friends. Say a prayer for this big baby! Back to school soon!
For example:
Oh, that delivery man was definitely a killer. He'll be back tonight.
Or, craigslist killer. I did give my address to the girl who never came or called.
Shaz. A serial killer (like Silence of Lambs) is going to come and get me...
I mean, the list goes on and on and gets more and more irrational. It is a running joke that I'm paranoid, and I know to some degree, God made me creative and able to see small details. However, I know that worry does not do any good.
As I'm home tonight (by myself), I think about some other things going on in my life. I think about being around some very sick people recently. I mean, very. These people are able to have faith and not be scared. Yet I am scared in my own home. What will I do when life really storms on me?
About six months ago, as I was talking about what I would do if a person held a gun on me, one of the people in the group (who had recently been mugged at gun point) asked me what I was so afraid of. It made me think. What am I so afraid of? Loss of control? Death? Losing someone I love? I mean, these are sad thoughts for bedtime, but it helps me to put everything in perspective. I need to be able to have peace in the good times (like right now) and the bad.
God, help me remember that you are always watching. No matter how much I allow myself to get freaked out, you are there. Everything is according to your plan.
Sleep tight bloggy friends. Say a prayer for this big baby! Back to school soon!
Tuesday, June 15, 2010
1 Down...
The first wedding of wedding season was perfect! I loved being able to watch (up close and personal) as my sister married JP. I am so excited about my new B-I-L, and it was such a wonderful day.
It really couldn't have been better, and I wouldn't change anything. (Well, except for getting some kind of gel insert for my wedding shoes.) We had so much fun.
Sunday was a very chill day and then on Monday, we moved M up to Louisville for her summer job. This made sweet Nadine (my mom) a littlle blue since two daughters were now more or less gone for the summer. We have all been a little off, not down necessarily, but just different. It was like the wedding took over our lives for the past year, and now it's over. You kind of don't know what to do. I think even SJP is a little bored on the honeymoon. She has been FBing me all the jobs she needs me to do. Somethings never change--no matter what country you're in.
I have to head back to Nashville tomorrow and next week for 1-2 days. Then, I'm back for good starting June 30th. This will be a HUUUGE adjustment for my mom since there will be 3 of us gone for the summer, which is usually our family time. LL is heading to WKU in August, and mom is seriously going to need a new project.
I am feeling a little more on top of things since my last post. I have spent pretty much all day today working at Panera in BG and have knocked out most of my paperwork requirements. Now, I'm staying ahead on my Lipscomb work before meeting my girlies (J, Sh, and Brit!) for dinner. Things are good.
Plus, huge answer to prayers--we have found a roommate! We may even have found 2! This is wonderful because it means I don't have to move. It also means I have no excuse to not beautify my house. I have several projects, including weeding, cleaning the garage steps, and (finally!) hanging pictures in my room to do before I head back to school. I am pumped on getting ahead of things and not stressing so much. July is going to be hard enough--starting TEACHING in the classroom, that I don't want additional drama.
Hope you're enjoying your Tuesday!
It really couldn't have been better, and I wouldn't change anything. (Well, except for getting some kind of gel insert for my wedding shoes.) We had so much fun.
Sunday was a very chill day and then on Monday, we moved M up to Louisville for her summer job. This made sweet Nadine (my mom) a littlle blue since two daughters were now more or less gone for the summer. We have all been a little off, not down necessarily, but just different. It was like the wedding took over our lives for the past year, and now it's over. You kind of don't know what to do. I think even SJP is a little bored on the honeymoon. She has been FBing me all the jobs she needs me to do. Somethings never change--no matter what country you're in.
I have to head back to Nashville tomorrow and next week for 1-2 days. Then, I'm back for good starting June 30th. This will be a HUUUGE adjustment for my mom since there will be 3 of us gone for the summer, which is usually our family time. LL is heading to WKU in August, and mom is seriously going to need a new project.
I am feeling a little more on top of things since my last post. I have spent pretty much all day today working at Panera in BG and have knocked out most of my paperwork requirements. Now, I'm staying ahead on my Lipscomb work before meeting my girlies (J, Sh, and Brit!) for dinner. Things are good.
Plus, huge answer to prayers--we have found a roommate! We may even have found 2! This is wonderful because it means I don't have to move. It also means I have no excuse to not beautify my house. I have several projects, including weeding, cleaning the garage steps, and (finally!) hanging pictures in my room to do before I head back to school. I am pumped on getting ahead of things and not stressing so much. July is going to be hard enough--starting TEACHING in the classroom, that I don't want additional drama.
Hope you're enjoying your Tuesday!
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