Friday, September 24, 2010

Ultimate Fail

So it's been over 1 month since I have written on this blog. It's really sad. This past month has been the hardest of my 23 years. Maybe that's a testament as to how relatively easy my life has been so far, but I have worked my tail off.

I have had days that were so horrible (a fight I couldn't break up that left me so shaken I closed/locked my door and sobbed) mixed in with days that went miraculously well. I have been bullied by parents, given countless hugs, and today one of my precious bees slung his arm around me and said "This is my teacher y'all." I have literally had to pray to get out of the car in the school parking lot several days because I just didn't want to go in. I have one class that even today completely walked all over me. I got a card from my 4th grade teacher that still makes me tune up to cry just writing about it. I have been so loved by friends and family, as for the first time in my life, I have struggled. There are teachers in my building who are so much better than me, and it's hard to watch them be more successful and feel like I am working harder. There are teachers in my building that the kids absolutely love. It is hard having some kids really not like me.

I mean, really not like. One of our vocab words this past week was loathe--to feel intense hate for... One of my bees used this sample sentence: I loathe Ms. Parsley. Nice. This little bee immediately told me they were just kidding. Hmm... Really made my day.

I have been pushing through and now have a weekend without a wedding or Saturday school. (AP's and CM's wedding were two high points during the month that helped keep me going!!!) I thought I should share.

Things are better (yesterday was awesome, today so-so), but thanks to all of you who texted, hugged, or loved on me during this month. I am so thankful to have so many blessings in my life. I will keep you posted. 14 days till fall break.

Lots of love, xoxo

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